Tuesday, April 26, 2011
Chapter 5: Stubborn? Or a glutton for punishment?
Okay, so after that disaster, and a few more weeks, I quickly began to realize that HurryDate.com sucks. (Yes, this my shameless endorsement - DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME!) I was at home, poking around on this useless site, completely regretting spending any money with them, when a commercial comes on the TV for Match.com. So I thought, "Why the hell not?" And signed up. (One more shameless endorsement - If you're looking for exposure, looking to be able to meet A LOT of people, and looking to have a lot of fun? Try Match.com. I'm not saying you will meet the person of your dreams there, but you will have a lot of fun trying. :-P )
So here we are, now in April, and I find myself signed up on THREE, count 'em, THREE internet dating sites? For someone who thought that the whole idea was weird, how did this happen??? So I set up my profile, uploaded a few pictures, and let Match do their thing. Who was out there that fit my criteria and also looking for someone like me? My "Mutual Match" list came up and at the top of the list, with an 80% compatibility was a picture that actually made me stop and hold my breath for a second. Wow... look at this guy... I couldn't click fast enough to read his profile.
And wouldn't you know? CHARMING! UTTERLY CHARMING! The whole thing, everything he said. Just the right mix of honesty, sarcasm, humor, and wit. He conveyed confidence, intelligence, and magnetism. Now, don't get me wrong, he wasn't some Adonis-Brad Pitt look alike that I figured I would have a snowball's chance in hell with. But he was *MY* type: tall, lanky, with just the right amount of cocky, geeky, sexy, and swarthy all rolled into one. Without hesitation, I sent him a virtual "wink". And then I found myself obsessively checking about once an hour after that to see if he winked back or sent me an email.
The next day, I got my return "wink" from “Tramp.” WHOO HOO! He was interested. I'd love to be able to write that it turned out as a faery tale romance that rode off into the sunset, but here we are, over six months later, and I'm writing this blog, so it's safe to assume that things didn't happen that way. However, the proper build up is required here, and I think I will stretch this one out into several chapters.
Okay, time to turn on the charm! I'd never sent an email out like this before. How should I approach him so that he'd be jumping through hoops to meet me? I decided on a safe approach. If he was interested, maybe he'd like to know a little about me? So I wrote him an email, telling him how incredibly charming his profile was and how much I enjoyed reading it. I told him a little about me, where I went to college, and a few extracurricular activities I enjoy.
Three days, no response. What had I said wrong? How could I possibly have turned him off so quickly? My practical side told me to walk away. But my stubborn side said, "You said you were forward and aggressive on your profile... Why not just ASK “Tramp” what you said wrong? If you can't have him anyway, why not at least get some constructive criticism on how to do this in the future?" So that's exactly what I did: I wrote to him, and asked him for some advice on how to approach men in the future, since whatever I had said or done had turned him off.
Well, he responded... QUICKLY. I was ecstatic. We bounced a few emails back and forth and agreed to talk on the phone later. He gave me his number and I proceeded to sit on my hands as long as I could possibly stand it before I grabbed the phone and called him.
It was awesome. We talked for over two hours. About anything, everything. We laughed, we joked, it was like no holds barred. He held nothing back. He had no problem exposing who he was, warts and all. He was so comfortable about who he was, that it made me comfortable to just be who I am. I felt like I could just be myself, in the raw, with him. And, frankly, he preferred it that way. He would call me out on it if he sensed that I was holding something back. If this phone call never ended, I was fine with that. Sooner or later, as always seems to happen, the conversation got frisky. I'm not about to deny it: I wanted this guy. I wanted this guy like I hadn't wanted anybody in YEARS. Had he pushed me to meet him that night, just for sex, I probably would have said yes. But he didn't. :) However, when he took our phone conversation to an even friskier place, I certainly didn't stop him.
Let's just skip to the punchline. It was incredible. I always thought that phone sex was cheap and weird and stupid. I mean, how can you possibly enjoy anything with a phone attached to your ear? Okay, NOW I GET IT. It was awesome. I was officially smitten. “Tramp” was smart, he was sexy, he was stable, and I wanted him to be mine....
So here we are, now in April, and I find myself signed up on THREE, count 'em, THREE internet dating sites? For someone who thought that the whole idea was weird, how did this happen??? So I set up my profile, uploaded a few pictures, and let Match do their thing. Who was out there that fit my criteria and also looking for someone like me? My "Mutual Match" list came up and at the top of the list, with an 80% compatibility was a picture that actually made me stop and hold my breath for a second. Wow... look at this guy... I couldn't click fast enough to read his profile.
And wouldn't you know? CHARMING! UTTERLY CHARMING! The whole thing, everything he said. Just the right mix of honesty, sarcasm, humor, and wit. He conveyed confidence, intelligence, and magnetism. Now, don't get me wrong, he wasn't some Adonis-Brad Pitt look alike that I figured I would have a snowball's chance in hell with. But he was *MY* type: tall, lanky, with just the right amount of cocky, geeky, sexy, and swarthy all rolled into one. Without hesitation, I sent him a virtual "wink". And then I found myself obsessively checking about once an hour after that to see if he winked back or sent me an email.
The next day, I got my return "wink" from “Tramp.” WHOO HOO! He was interested. I'd love to be able to write that it turned out as a faery tale romance that rode off into the sunset, but here we are, over six months later, and I'm writing this blog, so it's safe to assume that things didn't happen that way. However, the proper build up is required here, and I think I will stretch this one out into several chapters.
Okay, time to turn on the charm! I'd never sent an email out like this before. How should I approach him so that he'd be jumping through hoops to meet me? I decided on a safe approach. If he was interested, maybe he'd like to know a little about me? So I wrote him an email, telling him how incredibly charming his profile was and how much I enjoyed reading it. I told him a little about me, where I went to college, and a few extracurricular activities I enjoy.
Three days, no response. What had I said wrong? How could I possibly have turned him off so quickly? My practical side told me to walk away. But my stubborn side said, "You said you were forward and aggressive on your profile... Why not just ASK “Tramp” what you said wrong? If you can't have him anyway, why not at least get some constructive criticism on how to do this in the future?" So that's exactly what I did: I wrote to him, and asked him for some advice on how to approach men in the future, since whatever I had said or done had turned him off.
Well, he responded... QUICKLY. I was ecstatic. We bounced a few emails back and forth and agreed to talk on the phone later. He gave me his number and I proceeded to sit on my hands as long as I could possibly stand it before I grabbed the phone and called him.
It was awesome. We talked for over two hours. About anything, everything. We laughed, we joked, it was like no holds barred. He held nothing back. He had no problem exposing who he was, warts and all. He was so comfortable about who he was, that it made me comfortable to just be who I am. I felt like I could just be myself, in the raw, with him. And, frankly, he preferred it that way. He would call me out on it if he sensed that I was holding something back. If this phone call never ended, I was fine with that. Sooner or later, as always seems to happen, the conversation got frisky. I'm not about to deny it: I wanted this guy. I wanted this guy like I hadn't wanted anybody in YEARS. Had he pushed me to meet him that night, just for sex, I probably would have said yes. But he didn't. :) However, when he took our phone conversation to an even friskier place, I certainly didn't stop him.
Let's just skip to the punchline. It was incredible. I always thought that phone sex was cheap and weird and stupid. I mean, how can you possibly enjoy anything with a phone attached to your ear? Okay, NOW I GET IT. It was awesome. I was officially smitten. “Tramp” was smart, he was sexy, he was stable, and I wanted him to be mine....
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