The Truth is Stranger Than Fiction - An Introduction

Truth is Stranger Than Fiction - An Introduction

My first foray into the Social Networking world was some years ago, in 2005 I believe, with Yahoo. They had a site called Yahoo 360° that was their own attempt at MySpace, which, at the time, was all the rage. I hadn't been bitten by the MySpace bug yet, but I was already an active member of Yahoo, so to get my feet wet, I set up a Yahoo 360° profile.

Blogging was an extremely attractive prospect to me. I love to write, I love to give myself that type of "outlet" to my problems, fears, joys, and experiences. I've kept diaries and journals off and on over the years and they've always been therapeutic when I took the time to keep them up. But this... a public diary? How do I approach such a thing? How much do I divulge? And what, praytel, do I write about that would actually entice people to read it?

Browsing thru existing blogs, one thing was an absolute MUST: I could not, would not, write about mundane things that no one but myself would care about. I needed an angle-- Something that I could write passionately about. Something that people, in general, have an interest in. Something that would grab the attention of the public. And something that had a "theme." I found that, to me personally, a blog that jumped around all over the place was difficult to read. A theme would keep me in check, and allow me to focus, rather than a stream of conscious that I was sure would bore to death anyone who came across my page.

The idea came to me fairly quickly. I was newly divorced and discovering the delights and annoyances of being single and dating in my 30's. It was perfect!
Love, sex, relationships, dating... The overall general interaction between men and women has always been a fascination and a sure-fire hit to our society, if not our entire species! I had my topic, I was ready to roll...

Yahoo has since shut down their 360° forum, and the experience I had there was both rewarding and therapeutic. So I am going to retell my adventures in a retro-active tale here, and see if I can gather the same, if not bigger, audience I did there. Maybe I can even get inspired enough to bring the whole thing up to date and wrap it all up into a happy ending? We shall see...

So, here we go! Hello, my name is Jennifer. I am 37 years old and I've been divorced just over 6 years now. Fasten your seat belts, boys and girls, it's gonna be one hell of a ride!

Saturday, May 14, 2011

Chapter 13: This looks promising...

So, thankfully, "Manny" didn't try to call me again. Something tells me that Caller ID would have come in QUITE handy if he had. Maybe not. I try to pride myself on being honest and upfront in all cases. I suppose I would have told him that I didn't feel a connection the next time he called, and if he insisted on contacting me, then I would have to start avoiding him. Fortunately, I didn't have to find out how I would have handled it.

I'd been contacted by "Buzz" on Yahoo Personals. He was a self-admitted sci-fi geek, but he was really adorable. And he was smart. He may have been interested in role-playing games, but he wasn't all-consumed with it to the point that made him "weird." And he was too damn cute to be "geeky". :)

We exchanged a few emails, graduated to Instant Messenger, and I was becoming more intrigued with every conversation. Due to my own naivety, my inexperience in this adult-dating world, and, I suppose, my own lack of self-restraint, several of the Instant Message conversations got frisky. I'll admit it, I was getting ancy. While I had seemingly had plenty of dates, quite a few kisses, and even a little play mixed in, I had not actually been sexual with anyone except for that one disaster with “Horace” that was so awful. Here I've been officially back out in the dating world for over 3 months, and I haven't gotten any action yet? There HAD to be better out there, right?

We set up a dinner date, and I had every intention of having dinner with this guy and then taking him home with me. I had essentially let him know this in no uncertain terms as well. We met for dinner at the Macaroni Grill. Dinner was great. We seemed to have a good bit to talk about and the conversation flowed without any awkward silences. I was feeling a connection, and I was just weighing my options on how to act on them. The bill came and the first awkward silence came as the unspoken question of, "What do we do now?" floated between us. I asked him if he wanted to go somewhere else, not sure if I should be so bold as to ask him back to my house.

He paused, took a deep breath, and smiled at me while telling me that he wanted to be honest in that he just wasn't feeling a connection between us. My first reaction was, "Well, shit..." But then I realized that I appreciated him being upfront more than he could know. He wasn't feeling it, and he let me know that. No promises of a phone call tomorrow, no avoiding, or ignoring, and no disappearing act. THIS is what adult dating should be like, shouldn't it? Honest, upfront, mature, and no games.

So I was rejected, but at the same time, given a new cause for hope that dating in my 30's might actually have some merit. I don't actually know why "Buzz" wasn't attracted to me. Maybe my laugh was too loud, maybe I was too heavy for him, maybe there was a piece of spinach stuck in my teeth all night. But you know what? it doesn't matter why. Because he told me with all honesty, I accepted it, and never thought twice about the fact that I never heard from him again. Way to go, Buzz!

Lesson Number Nine: Keep it casual, don't take rejection personally, and all will be well that ends well.

Status: Ehhhh... Only half-way learned.

1 comment:

  1. Good lesson! It's hard not to take personal rejection personally. You are the one found lacking but I agree 100% it's better to find out right away. A lot of people try to replace actual chemistry with drugs or booze. It's either there or not.
    Good luck on the dating thing and 3 months? That's not so long :) I've been single for a year and a half now. I can count on one hand how many men I've accepted dates from. Our standards get higher as we get older. It's not a bad thing.


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